Nex, a gender fluid trans teen is dead in Oklahoma. Their death comes after a year of transphobic bullying, in a school targeted by the biggest anti-trans influencers. When will it end?
I’ve made so many comments on so many posts memorializing and telling Nex’s story. My heart has been breaking over and over again these past few days. At the end of the day, the passing of legislation matters…but the effects of its mere introduction, the entertaining of these ridiculous restrictions around things like bathroom use, very often carry deadly consequences. Nex’s story is just the one we *know*. Bullying, regardless of reason, has been tolerated in this country for way too long, and teens very often carry the beliefs and anger of their adults, regardless of whether or not they understand the motivation for it.
Mourn the dead, and fight like hell for the living.
We’ll fight with empathy, compassion, science, beauty, truth, freedom, love, and all the wonderful things that make this life worth living.
Definitely what I'm seeing about provoking others to be violent towards us. You had better believe there are others that aren't publicized because their parents aren't telling anybody their child was trans.
I agree what makes life worth living, but that kumbaya stuff isn't working with those people. We have no spotlight on our issues with all this. The mainstream media is only focusing on the GOP narratives The kids who killed Nex are walking away scot-free.
How will we break through? That's my question. It will all boil down to a huge fight in the end, because the GOP is like a steamroller, inviting everybody to join in with that hatred, and forcing us all back into the closet with incredible speed.
My heart is breaking for that child, their parents, and all of us. We're in big trouble right now.
Also I really wish the gofundme didn’t deadname and misgender them sighhhhhh it’s really hard to donate when they do that. I’ll sleep on it and maybe donate to glsen or something too but as a non-binary person using they/them pronouns the lack of respect on the gofundme bothers me
But not as much as the fact that this hateful country did this to this child
FWIW the parents posted an update: “ We at this time are thankful for the ongoing support and did not expect the love from everyone. We are sorry for not using their name correctly and as parents we were still learning the correct forms. Please do not judge us as Nex was judged, please do not bully us for our ignorance on the subject. Nex gave us that respect and we are sorry in our grief that we overlooked them. I lost my child, the headstone will have correct name of their choice. The rest of monies will go to other children dealing with the right to be who they feel they are, in Nex Benedict’s name. God bless.”
Tragic. They seemed to be such a beautiful child, full of spirit. The police also suggested her death was due to other health conditions, without admitting those other conditions only became fatal after the beating. That is like saying someone died because their heart stopped, without saying their heart stopped because they were being choked. Everyone involved should be prosecuted, but that won't bring back this beautiful, vital child.
Full subbed. Had to arrange to pay through a friend, because of deadname issues, but...
I dunno. This one hits too hard. Maybe it's the utter, heartless brutality of the attack, or... something else. It's just become too much, lately. I can't even. Justice is the very least Nex deserves- but I fear they won't even be given that much dignity. A brilliant mind, snuffed out before their time. What wonders might they have discovered- how might they have bettered the lives of everyone around them? Those three little brainwashed fools deprived them, and everyone else, of the chance to find out. We lose not just a life, but a piece of our culture and of the advancement of our whole species, every time hate snuffs out such a light.
But it's more than that. I can't believe that a child, even a teenaged child, is beyond all reason yet- what horror awaits the murderers, in years to come, should they realize the full gravity of what they've done? Their parents are more to blame- they, and the stochastic terrorists on TV and right-wing scream-sites who fill their heads with lies, knowing full well what they wreak. The immediate perpetrators of this evil are victims, too, in the end. Children who could have grown up full of love and life, but who instead were twisted and weaponized as tools of hate.
We are all diminished by this- even the ones who revel in the slaughter, though they'll never admit it.
Beautifully said. And I completely agree. As mom to a trans teen in Texas, this one hits very very close to home. I’m just broken from the worry, the anxiety and the mistrust of others. I want to wrap my son up and take him someplace away from all this hate. Someplace where he’s free to be fully and unapologetically himself. But I know that there is no place to take him that’s fully safe from it all. And that breaks my heart. I hope these hate-mongering fascists burn in hell for all the harm they’ve caused with their lies.
And I have to wonder about those ER docs and nurses who released Nex after the attack. Was it truly just an unfortunate judgement call, or something else?
This is an unspeakable tragedy. Pure evil. My heart grieves and I am basically at a loss for words. Despite that, I am grateful to Erin for covering such a deeply tragic story.
I dunno. This one is breaking me. Not just the utter cruelty of those three children (may they live long enough to utterly rue the day) but the complete failure of any adult to do anything, the nurse, the school administration, the hospital, the police. The police. One can simply not trust that they will do anything to keep lgbtq+ folks alive or find out who killed them to begin with. The utter depravity of the community.
The only men who think that transgender youths in bathrooms are dangerous are men who would sneak into women's bathrooms to get their jollies. Transgender youths are not dangerous, they are at risk from jackanapes like that.
This is crazy, disgusting, and heartbreaking. I see the effects all this is having on citizens of this country. I'll be out somewhere and hear the most disgusting things coming out of the mouths of strangers. We transmen fly under the radar, so we'll be anywhere and hear cisgender heterosexual people talking negatively about us. Because I'm alone, I can't say anything or that hatred will be directed straight at me. I have said minor things or just walked away.
I’ve made so many comments on so many posts memorializing and telling Nex’s story. My heart has been breaking over and over again these past few days. At the end of the day, the passing of legislation matters…but the effects of its mere introduction, the entertaining of these ridiculous restrictions around things like bathroom use, very often carry deadly consequences. Nex’s story is just the one we *know*. Bullying, regardless of reason, has been tolerated in this country for way too long, and teens very often carry the beliefs and anger of their adults, regardless of whether or not they understand the motivation for it.
Mourn the dead, and fight like hell for the living.
We’ll fight with empathy, compassion, science, beauty, truth, freedom, love, and all the wonderful things that make this life worth living.
But make no mistake. We’ll fight.
Definitely what I'm seeing about provoking others to be violent towards us. You had better believe there are others that aren't publicized because their parents aren't telling anybody their child was trans.
I agree what makes life worth living, but that kumbaya stuff isn't working with those people. We have no spotlight on our issues with all this. The mainstream media is only focusing on the GOP narratives The kids who killed Nex are walking away scot-free.
How will we break through? That's my question. It will all boil down to a huge fight in the end, because the GOP is like a steamroller, inviting everybody to join in with that hatred, and forcing us all back into the closet with incredible speed.
My heart is breaking for that child, their parents, and all of us. We're in big trouble right now.
I can’t even look at their sweet little face, this is so cruel.
These right wing monsters must have unspeakable karma visited upon them.
My heart is broken.
Horrible tragedy and I have no words
Also I really wish the gofundme didn’t deadname and misgender them sighhhhhh it’s really hard to donate when they do that. I’ll sleep on it and maybe donate to glsen or something too but as a non-binary person using they/them pronouns the lack of respect on the gofundme bothers me
But not as much as the fact that this hateful country did this to this child
FWIW the parents posted an update: “ We at this time are thankful for the ongoing support and did not expect the love from everyone. We are sorry for not using their name correctly and as parents we were still learning the correct forms. Please do not judge us as Nex was judged, please do not bully us for our ignorance on the subject. Nex gave us that respect and we are sorry in our grief that we overlooked them. I lost my child, the headstone will have correct name of their choice. The rest of monies will go to other children dealing with the right to be who they feel they are, in Nex Benedict’s name. God bless.”
True, and that’s the only reason I was still going to give
I wish they would adjust the header 😞
Tragic. They seemed to be such a beautiful child, full of spirit. The police also suggested her death was due to other health conditions, without admitting those other conditions only became fatal after the beating. That is like saying someone died because their heart stopped, without saying their heart stopped because they were being choked. Everyone involved should be prosecuted, but that won't bring back this beautiful, vital child.
Rest in Power Nex. :(. Chaya Raichik for prison!
She can’t get away with this forever. I remain hopeful that at some point she and her ilk are going to go down HARD.
Full subbed. Had to arrange to pay through a friend, because of deadname issues, but...
I dunno. This one hits too hard. Maybe it's the utter, heartless brutality of the attack, or... something else. It's just become too much, lately. I can't even. Justice is the very least Nex deserves- but I fear they won't even be given that much dignity. A brilliant mind, snuffed out before their time. What wonders might they have discovered- how might they have bettered the lives of everyone around them? Those three little brainwashed fools deprived them, and everyone else, of the chance to find out. We lose not just a life, but a piece of our culture and of the advancement of our whole species, every time hate snuffs out such a light.
But it's more than that. I can't believe that a child, even a teenaged child, is beyond all reason yet- what horror awaits the murderers, in years to come, should they realize the full gravity of what they've done? Their parents are more to blame- they, and the stochastic terrorists on TV and right-wing scream-sites who fill their heads with lies, knowing full well what they wreak. The immediate perpetrators of this evil are victims, too, in the end. Children who could have grown up full of love and life, but who instead were twisted and weaponized as tools of hate.
We are all diminished by this- even the ones who revel in the slaughter, though they'll never admit it.
Beautifully said. And I completely agree. As mom to a trans teen in Texas, this one hits very very close to home. I’m just broken from the worry, the anxiety and the mistrust of others. I want to wrap my son up and take him someplace away from all this hate. Someplace where he’s free to be fully and unapologetically himself. But I know that there is no place to take him that’s fully safe from it all. And that breaks my heart. I hope these hate-mongering fascists burn in hell for all the harm they’ve caused with their lies.
And I have to wonder about those ER docs and nurses who released Nex after the attack. Was it truly just an unfortunate judgement call, or something else?
Heartbreaking.
This is an unspeakable tragedy. Pure evil. My heart grieves and I am basically at a loss for words. Despite that, I am grateful to Erin for covering such a deeply tragic story.
I dunno. This one is breaking me. Not just the utter cruelty of those three children (may they live long enough to utterly rue the day) but the complete failure of any adult to do anything, the nurse, the school administration, the hospital, the police. The police. One can simply not trust that they will do anything to keep lgbtq+ folks alive or find out who killed them to begin with. The utter depravity of the community.
Yes this is extra awful, everyone involved beyond the victim is looking like monsters.
My nightmare
Chaiya Raichik has blood on her hands.
Really good writeup. I remember Matthew Shepard too. Change will be up to us to not let Nex happen again.
Everything about Nex reminds me of my kid. Rest in peace, sweet one. I’m sorry.
The only men who think that transgender youths in bathrooms are dangerous are men who would sneak into women's bathrooms to get their jollies. Transgender youths are not dangerous, they are at risk from jackanapes like that.
This is crazy, disgusting, and heartbreaking. I see the effects all this is having on citizens of this country. I'll be out somewhere and hear the most disgusting things coming out of the mouths of strangers. We transmen fly under the radar, so we'll be anywhere and hear cisgender heterosexual people talking negatively about us. Because I'm alone, I can't say anything or that hatred will be directed straight at me. I have said minor things or just walked away.
Here's an example I created and it was no stranger: https://youtu.be/yLgadKi61OY?feature=shared.
Sure reminds me of what was going on during the civil rights movement, but nobody is fighting back. It's mind-boggling and folks are paralyzed.
I don't know what else to say except RIP Nex.